she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
