Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Randomize
