I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
