I think i peed on brittanys purse
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
