Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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