Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
