We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
