i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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