My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
