it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
