I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
