i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
