We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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