idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
