I'm lost and stupid without you.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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