If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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