you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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