Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
