yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
