I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
