the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Randomize
