Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I forgot wine drunk hurts
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
