You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize