The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize