let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Randomize
