Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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