would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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