I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
