the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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