Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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