Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize