took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
