just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I party with great urgency now.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
