I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
