another moral hangover. fuck.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
