Non-Jews are for practice
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
