Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
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