STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
