This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Hippo gnu deer
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Randomize
