Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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