Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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