Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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