YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
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