Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
so explain again why im purple
no
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
