hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
