if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize