Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Randomize
