so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize