I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
