chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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