i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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